Goodbyes breed hellos.

Today I spent the day with my favourite boy; We watched Jeremy Kyle, and talked about life and love. And it got me thinking that 3 years ago I didn't have this boy in my life, in any way whatsoever. I didn't miss him because I hadn't met him but I was aching for a friendship like this. At this point in my life I was a little lost and although I was comfortable I really wasn't happy. I hopped up to university and not to be too 'Avenue Q' about it (seen it last night - awesome!) but I really felt like this change was one of those things that really was for the best. Even though it was SO hard at the start.

And it got me to thinking about all the great experiences and friendships I've had which started off really terribly. Don't worry I'm not about to spout the 'life is hard' speech but I really believe that what brings us happiness is usually disguised and not immediately obvious. I've never wanted something rational and although my life is not guarantying me anything - I believe that in order to get what I want I'm going to have to wade myself through long work hours and I'm going to encounter some truly horrible people. This really scares me, and I'm not sure where it'll take me in the long run. But being on the brink of something new, be it work or life in general excites me. The entire world being your oyster is powerful. You're in your prime, you're young and ambitious - you gotta live.

Inevitably with all this moving on and new plans you gotta let go of the stuff with is getting you down. Anything that makes you feel worthless, is not worth keeping. But it can be hard - because it can be comfort too ironically. There's a line in a Pink song called 'Mean' which says 'we've got so used to this abuse, it's kinda feels like home'. Sometimes you gotta leave home, and go and stay in your friends bed even though it's awkward and hard - but it pushes you forward and it pushes you away from what you know you shouldn't do.

So life is different, and life is good. And as of yet I don't have anything set in stone, and I'm still serving my coffees and reading my books. But I'll tell you one thing - I'm determined to stay this happy, and life is not going to bring me down as long as I have that boy listening to my secrets and drinking milkshakes with me beside fountains.

Really hope you're all happy.