New friends, old friends, and forever friends.

It's no secret that I've been treated like a doormat before when it comes to friendships. I believe that I'm loyal in friendships and when somebody is obviously is moving on and pushing me away, instead of letting them go and moving on - I hang on for dear life because I value the friendship so much.

However that didn't change anything. I got hurt and the other party moved on, despite my refusal to do so myself.

It's hard to realise what friendships will last and which will fade when it's not easy to keep in contact. We can only give each other time and sometimes when we move on, we do leave people behind - and that's not necessarily a bad thing.

I have friends I've had since I was no age. Friends who if I seen in town I'd go and have lunch with and there would be no awkwardness at all that we hadn't spoken in a period of time. I also have ex-friend who if I seen due to the kind of person they are I've decided I don't want in my life as they just caused destruction and pain when they were in my life.

I'm at a period in my life now where I'm surrounded by friends. In September I'll be living with 4 of them with all the others living very close by and I'll be going to parties with these people, doing shopping, watching movies and bitching about bills and running out of money.

Whilst I'll be having a great time, I can tell you now that some of these people I won't see in 5 years. Maybe I'll catch them in the street one day and have lunch, or maybe we'll walk past each other (hopefully not!). To me it's not important who will last, and I won't separate myself from those who in my mind I won't have lasting friendship with.

I believe in living for the moment. I believe in having as much fun as I can in the time I'm in the minute as tomorrow or next year I won't have these people beside me, and I'll have different ones to share my joys with.

Amongst these thoughts though, I know in my heart that some of these people will be in my life for a very long time because I believe in thier loyalty and I've seen it when our friendship isn't easy to continnue with. I see thier efforts, I see how much they care for me and love me. The future plans are a wish for us both.

I look forward to having lasting friendship, but I look forward to having a great time with all those around me, and growing with these people as they shape me to who I will be in future.

I love my friends. :)