I'm opinionated. In heated conversation I get pretty well, heated and I hate being patronised or manipulated. I like fighting back for myself, I don't like to have somebody who is hurtful or spiteful to win or have the last word over me. However, I've realised that there's only so much fighting you can do and when you lose sight of why or what you're fighting for. You need to look at the consequences of you breaking your heart arguing, and you just have to let your head win and just leave it alone. Just close your mouth and take in all the horrible insults because the people who're worth fighting for don't talk in that way to you.
I mean for me keeping quiet was darn near impossible, but when you're in a vicous circle of putting your heart on the line and watching it each time get torn to pieces you get told by those who love you to choose happiness. You continue to hear peoples' paranoia making you look like you're Sid Vicious when it wasn't even about them, you're shown so-called evidence against you that you could prove in a sentence isn't true, you're accused and pointed at but you just have to stop fighting a battle with no end in sight and take all the punches (just for a change).
I guess it's hard not to feel like the victim, and it's hard not to want to stoop down to the level and just go in arms swinging and annilate the other (even if you could). You ultimately choose yourself and those who love you over those who're trying to prove you're the worst person in the world. So dry your heavy tears and stop beating yourself up, and concentrate on those you love, and those who prove they love you back.
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